Life is stupid. But that’s what makes it worth living.
You know, if I were to die (suicide, accident or otherwise) it would be nothing more than a number going up on this counter (Source — https://www.worldometers.info/). Everyone who knows me will also die one day. Someone’s kids might know me and remember me, but their kids won’t. So if I die today, I’ll be mostly forgotten in less than 45 years. No one will know who Ishaan was or what he did or what he didn’t do. The most that’ll happen is I’ll be a photo hanging on a wall somewhere. So if you think of all that, what’s the point in living? I don’t matter in the grand scheme of things. I’m but a mere speck in this universe. Even compared to something close like the sun, my life is shorter and less worthless than a Mayfly Dolania Americana. I don’t have anything to give to the world that could make it a better place. Screw that, I can’t even make a better place for people I care about. So wouldn’t it be so much easier to just die?
Death is beautiful, I believe, and not scary. And the sooner you realize that the less afraid you are of death. What is the point of being afraid of it? It’s going to happen one day to me, to you, to everyone. If we stopped thinking of death as something to avoid and something to cherish, I think this world could become a whole lot better. And what even is death. It’s honestly nothing terrifying. You stop breathing, stop thinking, stop caring. You are just at peace forever. Your body will decompose, your bones will too. Soon you’ll be nothing but a part of the earth. And I think that is beautiful. It’s peaceful. To quote Oscar Wilde,
Death must be so beautiful. To lie in the soft brown earth, with the grasses waving above one’s head, and listen to silence. To have no yesterday, and no to-morrow. To forget time, to forget life, to be at peace.
And yet life still goes on. People give birth, people die. And it doesn’t matter even one single bit. There are approximately 100 billion dead people and, even if I’m being lenient, we remember only 0.00001% of them. Heck, all of humanity could die this instant and it would not matter at all. The Earth will still spin, the sun will continue to combust. Nature will take over the Earth once more. Who would care then?
Yet here I still am. Here you still are. Living despite this all. And I think that is something really brave and strong we are doing, and we don’t give ourselves enough credit for it. We could die any instant and nothing we did would matter, but we still wake up every morning and go through our day. Some might like doing that, some might not, and some might even hate it. But we do it anyway. Is it stupid? Yes. Is it worthless? Of course it is. Is it cumbersome? You bet. But we still do it. And that is just crazy to me. We live every day with all this realization inside our heads. Some think of it, others don’t. But we all know it. But we still persevere. We still do it each day, every day, until we eventually cease to exist.
And that is what makes life so crazy but worth living. Going through every day knowing it could be your last, knowing that whatever you do won’t matter at all, yet still doing the same thing every day. And I might not even like the life I am currently living, but it can all change at any given instant. It could change for the worse, or for the better, and I wouldn’t really realize it for a while. And this thought is currently keeping me going. Knowing that life is absolutely bonkers and it doesn’t matter what anyone is doing, yet seeing people get up every single day and do their best.
We call people in capes superheroes, but aren’t we the actual superheroes? It takes a brave mind and a brave heart to know this and understand all this, but still do it. We all are superheroes in our own rights. And I just hope everyone can realize that one day, even though I might not believe it myself. I might not believe that I am capable of much. I might not believe that I can make it. But in the end, nothing I think or believe matters. Because I’m still doing the same things every day waiting for my death, which can come knocking at any instant. And that is the craziest thing ever. But to sum this 870+ words worth of stuff, life is crazy. Life is beautiful. Life is stupid and life is chaos. But all this makes it worth living. And that is what I believe.
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